http://theworldistwirly.blog.co.uk/random thoughts of a twenty something girl desperately trying to find herself or some kind of sanityen-EUMokoFeed10http://theworldistwirly.blog.co.uk/http://data5.blog.de/design/preview/9e/07dda2dd45543594d3f1a0558a60ae_160x200.jpghttp://theworldistwirly.blog.co.uk/2009/11/15/rant-ahoy-7381214/tag:theworldistwirly.blog.co.uk,2009-11-15:/2009/11/15/rant-ahoy-7381214/Sun, 15 Nov 2009 23:48:02 +0100 <p>I have just seen on the news that they have a man in custody believed to have raped up to 200 old and vulnerable people. His sick depravity stetched even further as he removed light bulbs and fuses and tortured these people in the dark. the oldest woman is believed to be 92. Now i'm not a great believer in the death penalty, i don't think we have to right to decided who lives or who dies, but sometimes i am driven to believe that there are sick fuckers who shouldn't be allowed to draw another breath. </p> <p>If this was my gran i'd want to personally beat the living daylights out of him. </p> <p>rant over </p> <p> <small> <a href="http://theworldistwirly.blog.co.uk/2009/11/15/rant-ahoy-7381214/#comments">Comments</a> </small> </p>http://theworldistwirly.blog.co.uk/2009/11/15/rant-ahoy-7381214/#commentshttp://theworldistwirly.blog.co.uk/2009/11/08/how-do-you-know-when-a-friendship-is-built-to-last-7333659/tag:theworldistwirly.blog.co.uk,2009-11-08:/2009/11/08/how-do-you-know-when-a-friendship-is-built-to-last-7333659/Sun, 08 Nov 2009 21:38:33 +0100 <p>I seem to be diluded, I have a tendancy to put others first and I try to see the best in people. I would say i am a good friend. I try to keep in touch I go out of my way to see people. I am there when people need a shoulder to cry on.</p> <p>HOWEVER</p> <p>SO many of my friends have disappeared over the years, I know this happens but i had a really lovely group of friends at school and i can say that only two of them i see regularly one every month at least another a few times a year (because there is a distance issue) </p> <p>I again had a lovely group of friends when i was at uni for the first time</p> <p>again i had a fab group of mates who i worked with in my old job, but where are they now???</p> <p>I seem to go through close friends like i do clothes, some old favourites stay but most get grown out of, lost or worn thin.</p> <p>I know I can't do any more i always try so what can i do? AM i friends with the wrong type of people, people who like flash in the pan mates who hang around for a year and not close friends. Is it me is it something i do to drive them away?? </p> <p>I again have a circle of friends around me now a mixture of people but most of my social side is with people i have met at uni, once that is gone then what I'll have more short term friends from a job i get into i suppose.</p> <p>This has all been triggered by finding out one of my best friends from school is now married, i found out..... by seeing some pics on facebook. I know it's because school wasn't a great time for her and despite me trying she needed to move on. But i'm pissed off, i feel used.</p> <p>I feel used generally what's the point spending all this time listening to people, caring about them and putting yourself out when ultimately no one gives a shit. My brother still has a really close circle of friends, people he knew from school and he's only a few years younger than me, so I know it can happen. It must just be me!</p> <p> <small> <a href="http://theworldistwirly.blog.co.uk/2009/11/08/how-do-you-know-when-a-friendship-is-built-to-last-7333659/#comments">Comments</a> </small> </p>http://theworldistwirly.blog.co.uk/2009/11/08/how-do-you-know-when-a-friendship-is-built-to-last-7333659/#commentshttp://theworldistwirly.blog.co.uk/2009/10/22/no-korea-for-me-7223827/tag:theworldistwirly.blog.co.uk,2009-10-22:/2009/10/22/no-korea-for-me-7223827/Thu, 22 Oct 2009 17:00:22 +0200 <p>As some of you may have seen on facebook, korea for new yr/xmas time is out<br> My brother has these compulsory camp type things where he has to teach, he starts on the 28th of december. SO my plans to see him are out. </p> <p>I feel really sad about it, i miss him and really wanted to see him, he is finding it tough out there as it is and now he not only has christmas away from home but has to spend new year in a dormatory. </p> <p>I'm sure he will be fine but it's a let down for me too, i needed some time away and something to look forward to this year is going to be such hard work and a complete bummer.</p> <p>I have consolled myself by wasting £400 on a digital SLR camera mwahaha <img src="/img/smilies/icon_mrgreen.gif" alt=":>>" class="middle" border="0"> </p> <p> <small> <a href="http://theworldistwirly.blog.co.uk/2009/10/22/no-korea-for-me-7223827/#comments">Comments</a> </small> </p>http://theworldistwirly.blog.co.uk/2009/10/22/no-korea-for-me-7223827/#commentshttp://theworldistwirly.blog.co.uk/2009/10/09/kids-constantly-suprise-me-7133653/tag:theworldistwirly.blog.co.uk,2009-10-09:/2009/10/09/kids-constantly-suprise-me-7133653/Fri, 09 Oct 2009 20:38:28 +0200 <p>There is a girl i work with who is 13, she really makes me giggle, she's such an odd bod. She comes out with random things to say, some find her loud and irritating but i really have a soft spot for her, I think she needs that extra bit of attention and support.</p> <p>She has been annoying me for weeks by calling me Belinda, i seriously didn't know why, it was really random but i humoured her with it, it's just her thing saying strange stuff.</p> <p>This week I asked her seriously, why call me belinda? (which couldn't really be further from my name) </p> <p>She told me that she has an auntie called Vicky who she really doesn't like, that she is mean to her, and she likes the name belina so that's why she calls me it. </p> <p>It may be odd but it has really made my week, i feel so flattered <img src="/img/smilies/icon_smile.gif" alt=":)" class="middle" border="0"> </p> <p> <small> <a href="http://theworldistwirly.blog.co.uk/2009/10/09/kids-constantly-suprise-me-7133653/#comments">Comments</a> </small> </p>http://theworldistwirly.blog.co.uk/2009/10/09/kids-constantly-suprise-me-7133653/#commentshttp://theworldistwirly.blog.co.uk/2009/10/07/discos-and-goodbyes-7121489/tag:theworldistwirly.blog.co.uk,2009-10-07:/2009/10/07/discos-and-goodbyes-7121489/Wed, 07 Oct 2009 23:33:24 +0200 <p>ok first the singles disco. It was amazingly awful, so bad infact that it was really good fun. It was like a peter kay wedding. I was surrounded by middle aged folk on the cop. I felt very young and after looking around realised that i'd rather be single than attend anything like that again. There was a lady who looked like she had put all of her clothes on to attend, talk about getting dressed in the dark. There was also bloke who was the spitting image of uncle fester, talk about a mixed bunch of weirdos. On the plus side i won the raffle and got a box of sweets (yes a raffle!) </p> <p>I have spent quite a bit of time with my brother recently too. I seemed to have said a hundred goodbyes and he hasn't even gone yet. His flight is on saturday. It's kind of weird because i know he is going for a year, then probably travelling, by that time i will have qualified and will be embarking on my grown up life. SOmehow saying goodbye to him is like the first step to life properly changing. I just feel really sad. I have enjoyed being around him especially now he is happy and seeing him go is like losing something really special. I really feel like we have reconnected and i know i will miss him. </p> <p> <small> <a href="http://theworldistwirly.blog.co.uk/2009/10/07/discos-and-goodbyes-7121489/#comments">Comments</a> </small> </p>http://theworldistwirly.blog.co.uk/2009/10/07/discos-and-goodbyes-7121489/#commentshttp://theworldistwirly.blog.co.uk/2009/10/04/impending-doom-7097258/tag:theworldistwirly.blog.co.uk,2009-10-04:/2009/10/04/impending-doom-7097258/Sun, 04 Oct 2009 17:52:13 +0200 <p>my friend is roping me into a singles disco tonight. I am guessing it will be the most horrifc disaster known to mankind. Yes there may be war, pestilance, famine etc</p> <p>but an over 25's singles disco has to beat all of that !!!! </p> <p> <small> <a href="http://theworldistwirly.blog.co.uk/2009/10/04/impending-doom-7097258/#comments">Comments</a> </small> </p>http://theworldistwirly.blog.co.uk/2009/10/04/impending-doom-7097258/#commentshttp://theworldistwirly.blog.co.uk/2009/09/20/home-from-london-7005613/tag:theworldistwirly.blog.co.uk,2009-09-20:/2009/09/20/home-from-london-7005613/Sun, 20 Sep 2009 20:28:20 +0200 <p>Well I'm back from that london, I'm really tired but what a laugh I have had.</p> <p>I still enjoy doing the touristy bits, London always fills me with awe, it's so big and enveloping you can't help but feel moved by it. </p> <p>The zoo was really cool, i haven't been to one since I was about 7 so i felt like a small child squealing with excitement about seeing monkeys and girafes. I have some cool snaps but too much of an effort tonight.</p> <p>We stayed in a travel lodge in covent garden, on drury lane. The location was fab and the staff were really lovely. I didn't find the muffin man who lives on drury lane but i did meet a lovely muffin lady in jenniebaby It was nice having the opportunity to meet up in the day time at the zoo. </p> <p>The night did not disappoint one bit, it was brilliant to catch up with everyone, and meet some new folks. Drinks were certainly flowing but so was the conversation, it's strange a few hours with blog people and you feel like you have known them a lifetime. I obviously got wasted and by the end of the night was a bit of a sight for sore eyes chatting to random people, dancing like a fool,getting a stamp for a club put on my forehead, and kissing everyone on the street on the cheek. (apparently i should have been mugged and stabbed 30 times <img src="/img/smilies/graylaugh.gif" alt=":))" class="middle" border="0"> ) </p> <p>So there's things in a nutshell, i'm sure there is more but my brain won't work now it is tired and pickled <img src="/img/smilies/icon_mrgreen.gif" alt=":>>" class="middle" border="0"> </p> <p>Just want to say a big thanks to everyone who went last night, and thanks to nici and her partner for walking soy and me back to the hotel, we would have gotten so lost otherwise! </p> <p> <small> <a href="http://theworldistwirly.blog.co.uk/2009/09/20/home-from-london-7005613/#comments">Comments</a> </small> </p>http://theworldistwirly.blog.co.uk/2009/09/20/home-from-london-7005613/#commentshttp://theworldistwirly.blog.co.uk/2009/09/15/brimming-with-excitement-6970163/tag:theworldistwirly.blog.co.uk,2009-09-15:/2009/09/15/brimming-with-excitement-6970163/Tue, 15 Sep 2009 16:23:39 +0200 <p>London this weekend baby YEAH! I haven't been in ages so it should be rather good. Knowing what soy and I are like there is bound to be ample mischief to keep us amused! </p> <p>I saw my brother yesterday and he is up for me visiting him at christmas, Once he is settled in there i shall start hounding him so I can plan the trip WOOOOOOO I may have to do the whole family bit christmas day but if i know i am off on holiday boxing day it will get me through it! New year in korea is going to be pretty amazing anyway. </p> <p> <small> <a href="http://theworldistwirly.blog.co.uk/2009/09/15/brimming-with-excitement-6970163/#comments">Comments</a> </small> </p>http://theworldistwirly.blog.co.uk/2009/09/15/brimming-with-excitement-6970163/#commentshttp://theworldistwirly.blog.co.uk/2009/09/13/christmas-away-6955317/tag:theworldistwirly.blog.co.uk,2009-09-13:/2009/09/13/christmas-away-6955317/Sun, 13 Sep 2009 16:23:26 +0200 <p>My little brother is off travelling again, well "working" teaching english in south korea.<br> So all those that said don't blow my savings I thank you as i may blow them in december <img src="/img/smilies/icon_smile.gif" alt=":)" class="middle" border="0"></p> <p>Christmas is just plain rubbish now, I have to trundle off to my dads who inevitabley makes me feel like shit, then come home to my mum and gran. Gran going on about my grandad not being there. ( I miss him to but it bloody ruins christmas) Phil comes and goes not feeling an obligation to anyone. I end up feeling like I must keep christmas alive ( I am a secret small child) I get excited and bop about but I end up being sucked dry and ultimately by christmas night I either go off to cry or sleeep, or both! </p> <p>SO I want to go out and see my brother, he hasn't gone yet like, I'm going to ask him tomorrow what he thinks. If he says yes I'll let him get settled out there for a few weeks so he knows where places are then book some tickets.</p> <p>I have spoken to my mum about it and she's not apposed she just doesn't want me to leave her with gran, so if it happens I can go on boxing day if i'm guilted into staying for christmas. Personally i'd go for the whole bloody holidays! It also means no shitty new year in a dingy hull pub or a crappy house party where everyone is pregnant - the joy! </p> <p> <small> <a href="http://theworldistwirly.blog.co.uk/2009/09/13/christmas-away-6955317/#comments">Comments</a> </small> </p>http://theworldistwirly.blog.co.uk/2009/09/13/christmas-away-6955317/#commentshttp://theworldistwirly.blog.co.uk/2009/09/13/dream-6955155/tag:theworldistwirly.blog.co.uk,2009-09-13:/2009/09/13/dream-6955155/Sun, 13 Sep 2009 15:56:09 +0200 <p>I just had a flash back to my dream last night.</p> <p>I dreamt I went to the garage to buy chocolate and i found a big bar of that milka stuff, you know the one with purple wrapping, then i got to the till and it wouldn't take my card, i kept pulling out different bank cards and non of them were right, in the end I had to give her a twenty pound note.</p> <p>RANDOM! </p> <p> <small> <a href="http://theworldistwirly.blog.co.uk/2009/09/13/dream-6955155/#comments">Comments</a> </small> </p>http://theworldistwirly.blog.co.uk/2009/09/13/dream-6955155/#commentshttp://theworldistwirly.blog.co.uk/2009/09/12/made-me-chuckle-6950994/tag:theworldistwirly.blog.co.uk,2009-09-12:/2009/09/12/made-me-chuckle-6950994/Sat, 12 Sep 2009 23:26:33 +0200 <p>I wonder how many Community Support Officers watch those Microsoft adverts and secretly think:</p> <p>"...I wish I was a P.C."</p> <p>My mate hates spiky plants and yesterday he sat on one.<br> Absolutely cactus pants.</p> <p><img src="/img/smilies/graylaugh.gif" alt=":))" class="middle" border="0"></p> <p> <small> <a href="http://theworldistwirly.blog.co.uk/2009/09/12/made-me-chuckle-6950994/#comments">Comments</a> </small> </p>http://theworldistwirly.blog.co.uk/2009/09/12/made-me-chuckle-6950994/#commentshttp://theworldistwirly.blog.co.uk/2009/09/12/cleanliness-is-next-to-6950912/tag:theworldistwirly.blog.co.uk,2009-09-12:/2009/09/12/cleanliness-is-next-to-6950912/Sat, 12 Sep 2009 23:04:29 +0200 <p>the devils work <img src="/img/smilies/graylaugh.gif" alt=":))" class="middle" border="0"> </p> <p>I have been regularly attacked by eight legged beasties recently, I figured this was to do with the time of year but also maybe to do with the 6 inches of dust covering my room. SO I had a clean up removed my washing off the floor, and the rest. My room is now nice and clean, the musty smell has gone and it actually looks nice for a change.</p> <p>the thing is ....</p> <p>I HATE IT </p> <p>My mess is like a barrier, shouting out leave me alone this is my space! I know where everything is (the floor) and it is like my own little nest of me. </p> <p>Now it's tidy i feel like someone has stolen my soul! </p> <p>People who know me will find my messy filthyness funny, I have such issues with other peoples filth and disease. I take my own duvet cover and pillow cases to hotels. I can't stand public transport. When i was on the tube in london i was convinced someone was going to release anthrax or small pox! I smell glasses before i use them. I am in effect a complete fruit loop! </p> <p>but my mess is mine, my own ....... my precious! </p> <p> <small> <a href="http://theworldistwirly.blog.co.uk/2009/09/12/cleanliness-is-next-to-6950912/#comments">Comments</a> </small> </p>http://theworldistwirly.blog.co.uk/2009/09/12/cleanliness-is-next-to-6950912/#commentshttp://theworldistwirly.blog.co.uk/2009/09/09/pigeon-poop-6931607/tag:theworldistwirly.blog.co.uk,2009-09-09:/2009/09/09/pigeon-poop-6931607/Wed, 09 Sep 2009 17:33:35 +0200 <p>Man I haven't written a post in a while. I keep meaning to but then my brain wanders and I start thinking about something else.</p> <p>Erm what have i been up to I had a rather fantastic night out with the uni lot, we went around a nearby town with lots of pubs and stuff. It's always a giggle with the girls and an all day bender every now and again is just what the dr order ( well not really, given the kidney damage <img src="/img/smilies/icon_mrgreen.gif" alt=":>>" class="middle" border="0">) It got to late in the evening and one was feeling rather amorous so i launched myself at a 25 year old who was chatting to me, To be honest I just needed to feel good about myself and it was the quickest and easiest solution <img src="/img/smilies/graylaugh.gif" alt=":))" class="middle" border="0"> </p> <p>Then I had a jolly out to yorkshire sculpture park with soy last week. I picked her up and we had a drinking session the night before, reclaiming our youth by listening to hits of the 90's. I am actually quite suprised we made it up the next day, let alone went on a trek for miles up a hill past some rather dodgy "art" I don't think I get sculpture. I love art even abstract art I can embrace, but I'm not a lover of modern art, the whole unmade bed crap. so when i saw giant metal blobs called untitled I wasn't exactly filled with entusiasm. Nor was I when after walking forever we found a big metal cage that allows you to "see life from a different perspective" - what as a bloody convict! And Maybe it was inappropriate to curl up as a ball next to the concrete blobs on the grass but i was making art interactive <img src="/img/smilies/icon_smile.gif" alt=":)" class="middle" border="0"> </p> <p>I have worked my way through series 1 to 3 of bones and series 1 to 4 of johnathan creek but still haven't opened a book to start my dissertation. I must get motivated.</p> <p>Today I decided to leave the house and stroll into the village I got 5 mins down the snicket when a pigeon decided to shit all down me, covering both my arms. I had to go home to have a second shower, I gagged all the way home. I swear I could feel the fuckers body temperature all warm and wet on me. How anyone sees this as lucky is beyond me. Needless to say i bought two lottery tickets and two scratch cards <img src="/img/smilies/graylaugh.gif" alt=":))" class="middle" border="0"> </p> <p>SO I'm off out tonight with another couple of uni buds, I love having time off when you have plans <img src="/img/smilies/icon_mrgreen.gif" alt=":>>" class="middle" border="0"> </p> <p><img src="/img/smilies/icon_wave.gif" alt=":wave:" class="middle" border="0"> </p> <p> <small> <a href="http://theworldistwirly.blog.co.uk/2009/09/09/pigeon-poop-6931607/#comments">Comments</a> </small> </p>http://theworldistwirly.blog.co.uk/2009/09/09/pigeon-poop-6931607/#commentshttp://theworldistwirly.blog.co.uk/2009/08/27/ok-here-it-goes-6830872/tag:theworldistwirly.blog.co.uk,2009-08-27:/2009/08/27/ok-here-it-goes-6830872/Thu, 27 Aug 2009 05:20:17 +0200 <p>I have to get this out tonight before i sleep, it's been hours and i'm still bubbling with rage. I don't deal with anger well. I usually bottle it up until it can surface as a mental illness <img src="/img/smilies/icon_smile.gif" alt=":)" class="middle" border="0"> </p> <p>Background - this is relating to shy guy, after our on off thing that went on for well over a year, but was mainly off and just a really good friendship (with him slightly adoring me as I was his first love, relationship, whatever) But we were close and cared about each other, we tried to make it work but it just wouldn't there was no real physical chemistry, i suppose because in the early days he said he wanted to be friends then came clean about the whole in expeirence bit, by then i had already felt rejected blah blah, there were complications caused by my feelings for my ex you know nothing is simple.</p> <p>ANyway in march he said that that was it he needed to cut ties and not speak to me, it was too hard seeing me and not being with me. I was upset but i understood and respected his wishes. A few months back we started talking again, phone msn etc about once a week, then i started seeing the cyborg. I told shy guy just out of respect really, not going into details just told him i was seeing someone. He then went into a melt down and had a div on me, partly at the realisation it would never happen between us, partly because he was aware he was on his own. Again I gave him the space, he went into a depression. But we still talked and he even saw me a month ago, told me he was moving on chatting to women on line, and we had a really good time. </p> <p>Then he started seeing this girl, she lives like 2 hrs away maybe a bit less, I was happy for him, a little touched by it as it's always hard when your ex moves on, but non the less we still chatted and text. I knew he saw her on weekends so i respected that and didn't text him then. I gave him a friendly text on mon and no reply.</p> <p>Then I get an e-mail today saying he was out with her and didn't check his phone til he was in a restaurant and she saw and he had to explain everything about us ( not that he could just say he had got a text from his friend oh no) So anyway he starts saying how we can't talk anymore, that it's not fair on her and he has to give her the full attention, that she doesn't deserve to be treated as I did to him with M ( which really fucked me off bringing that into it, he even said i ranted about him - talk about waving a red flag at a bull) That he has to concentrate on his relationship (FUCKING FOUR WEEKS!) then he starts banging on about how he will always have a special place in his heart for me and if i ever really need him he will be there, but he thinks it is best if we don't talk, so this women who he said was fine with it when he told her, so she would be ok. Like he was dumping me, HE DOESN'T NEED TO SAY ALL THAT!</p> <p>SO IT IS FINE TO BE FRIENDS BEFORE HE HAS A GIRLFRIEND but now he has one he doesn't want to know, There was more to the e-mail like but that's the jist. </p> <p>I'm pissed off because </p> <p>it's been a long time since there has been anything physical going on between us<br> it's like a close friend saying they want to cut all ties<br> he has dragged up criticisms of me which aren't even relevant to the discussion<br> i have been understanding of his feelings then he takes advantage and walks all over me<br> the e-mail is only half him i can tell he is being "advised" certain things</p> <p>so i replied to the e-mail telling him he was fickle, that i thought we had a special friendship whch had moved on from a relationship into something better.<br> I set him straight saying that i only "ranted" about M because he messed me about regarding his feelings towards me.<br> That he clearly didn't care about the importance of our friendship so therefore i wasn't important and i wouldn't ring him if i needed him.<br> and that i hoped it works out because he has lost a friend over her.<br> I then told him not to reply to it and to go away</p> <p>then i deleted him from facebook</p> <p>then i sent a text telling him i was deleting his number and he could shove it up his arse.</p> <p>so he rings, both of us crying and upset, i told him to go away and hung up, he rings back saying "please don't let it be like this" and how he want's to know how i am doing and hear from me ( erm contradiction here bud) i told him i was going out (which i was), him more of the don't leave it like this, so i ended with I haven't ended it like this you have, and i hung up. </p> <p>then he sends a melodramatic text banging on about moving on and all the fairwell shit and the oh don't hate me and that other people aren't like us they don't understand how we can be friends.</p> <p>so my text - i'm angry and upset i don't hate u do what u like!</p> <p>I know I struggled with the cyborg being close to his ex, but that was because they spoke everyday, they were married, they had had sex not long before we got together and she was moving near by. I have always been fine in relationships with men having female friends or ex friends, if you are comfortable and trust who you are with then it isn't an issue. </p> <p>I want him to find someone. I just don't see why it has to be at the expense of us chatting, meeting up fair enough but come on the odd text or chat on msn where is the problem!! I know he is inexperienced in relationships that maybe i expect too much of him, but it doesn't take away how i feel.</p> <p>I'm fucking sick of men I really am. I swear I haven't gotten close (even with friends) since i was a teenager, when everyone was evenly balanced, we talked shared feelings and were honest. I have just found getting older men are decietful, they say what they like to get what they want, they are willing to take take take from you until all that is left is a tiny blackened ball of hurt and mistrust. My problem is i care for people, I love them and trust them, I value them for who they are and all they do is shit on me.</p> <p>I'm so fed up, it's like i go out with mental cases, turn them into human beings then they fuck off and stick the boot in on the way out. </p> <p>so he ruined my night out with the girls and my whole evening.</p> <p>( note to any men reading this I'm not a man basher, just really struggling to find men with genuine feelings and emotions at the moment, that doesn't just wanna whak off to you on msn or use you as a door mat, a little loss of the man faith) </p> <p> <small> <a href="http://theworldistwirly.blog.co.uk/2009/08/27/ok-here-it-goes-6830872/#comments">Comments</a> </small> </p>http://theworldistwirly.blog.co.uk/2009/08/27/ok-here-it-goes-6830872/#commentshttp://theworldistwirly.blog.co.uk/2009/08/26/to-angry-6829630/tag:theworldistwirly.blog.co.uk,2009-08-26:/2009/08/26/to-angry-6829630/Wed, 26 Aug 2009 22:10:54 +0200 <p>I am actually too angry to write,</p> <p>it turns out that all the men i know are selfish self absorbed bastards who actually don't give a crap about anyone or their feelings! and are happy to shit on you even if you haven't done anything wrong, just to rub your nose in it. </p> <p>AAAAAAAARRRRRRRRGGGGGGGHHHHHHH</p> <p>Miza T soooo right when she said not to want my ex's to be happy but to just hate them! </p> <p>i'll explain tomorrow too upset and mad! </p> <p> <small> <a href="http://theworldistwirly.blog.co.uk/2009/08/26/to-angry-6829630/#comments">Comments</a> </small> </p>http://theworldistwirly.blog.co.uk/2009/08/26/to-angry-6829630/#commentshttp://theworldistwirly.blog.co.uk/2009/08/24/filled-monday-up-6812524/tag:theworldistwirly.blog.co.uk,2009-08-24:/2009/08/24/filled-monday-up-6812524/Mon, 24 Aug 2009 22:49:04 +0200 <p>Filled the day with mundane tasks;</p> <p>did some mind mapping on dissertation</p> <p>cleaned up a bit</p> <p>went to asda and spent stupid amounts of money on nothing</p> <p>bought series one of bones, i figure 22 episodes should fill some boredom time <img src="/img/smilies/icon_mrgreen.gif" alt=":>>" class="middle" border="0"></p> <p>have managed to plan some days, my best mate is around this weekend so should see her, planned a lunch for saturday, and there's some drinky time with uni buds on thursday. I've called one of my other friends to maybe arrange another lunch or tea. </p> <p>hopefully this will keep me sane, or turn me into an alcholic! </p> <p> <small> <a href="http://theworldistwirly.blog.co.uk/2009/08/24/filled-monday-up-6812524/#comments">Comments</a> </small> </p>http://theworldistwirly.blog.co.uk/2009/08/24/filled-monday-up-6812524/#commentshttp://theworldistwirly.blog.co.uk/2009/08/23/free-time-downer-6800055/tag:theworldistwirly.blog.co.uk,2009-08-23:/2009/08/23/free-time-downer-6800055/Sun, 23 Aug 2009 13:56:56 +0200 <p>Most people would be happy with having like 6 weeks of freedom, no work, no uni etc. the only thing I have to do is my dissertation, which isn't in until april so feeling the pressure on that is difficult. </p> <p>When I have nothing to do I start obsessing and hating myself, I know it's stupid, that in my freetime I waste it in self obsessed misery. I have put on weight again. (bloody alcohol and carbs) </p> <p>I have lots of friends but they are in a different place to me, either by physical location, work restrictions, or by where they are in their life i.e marriage babies etc.</p> <p>I want to be happy, i want to leave the house and do SOMETHING. But i can't or won't what can i do? where can I go. I'd leap up and go now i swear, just to avoid letting this feeling that I want to cry for no reason setting in. I just have no destination.</p> <p>Depression scares me, I have battled with it for years, I'm not in that place now but I don't want having time off to send me into a dark place again. </p> <p> <small> <a href="http://theworldistwirly.blog.co.uk/2009/08/23/free-time-downer-6800055/#comments">Comments</a> </small> </p>http://theworldistwirly.blog.co.uk/2009/08/23/free-time-downer-6800055/#commentshttp://theworldistwirly.blog.co.uk/2009/08/22/my-gran-is-a-batty-old-moose-6796300/tag:theworldistwirly.blog.co.uk,2009-08-22:/2009/08/22/my-gran-is-a-batty-old-moose-6796300/Sat, 22 Aug 2009 21:03:44 +0200 <p>We had a full family day with her yesderday, which was nice we had a giggle, went to seaside had you know "quality time" (family being my mum my gran, my brother and me) </p> <p>The thing is she is trying to sell her house, she needs to move on now that my grandad has died, she wants a life and a new circle of friends. I completely understand this. The new problem is that someone has told her about this retirement area near to a lake in a nice local town/village. It is basically static caravans built on demand with a 50 year life span. If she buys one it will use all her savings and as soon as she moves in she'll pretty much lose between 20 and 40 grand on the value. This isn't including the 1800 quid a year she has to spend on the ground rent. The ground rent as far as she has been told will go for the upkeep of a club house and security. - if she lives there for twenty years she'll end up spending 150,000 in total on effectively a 30,000 pounds static caravan (the club house hasn't been built and they are buying land piece by piece so security would be impossible. </p> <p>The retirement village is near a drain and a lake= rats </p> <p>She is going on the word of a woman who is giving her a sales pitch, playing on her being a lonely old lady, wanting company.</p> <p>there are no guarentees for any of the promised stuff</p> <p>if she hates it she will be hugely out of pocket if she moves again </p> <p>the whole thing is a scam and a money pit! </p> <p>my grans house now is lovely</p> <p>they have talked her out of 5,000 from the value of her house already so she could move straight in. </p> <p>so today has been spent with my brother convincing her not to make rushed decisions and to think about what she is doing. We want her to be happy, we aren't interested in her money, she should enjoy it, but no theiving bastard is robbing my gran!!! the result is she has gone off it *sighs with relief* </p> <p> <small> <a href="http://theworldistwirly.blog.co.uk/2009/08/22/my-gran-is-a-batty-old-moose-6796300/#comments">Comments</a> </small> </p>http://theworldistwirly.blog.co.uk/2009/08/22/my-gran-is-a-batty-old-moose-6796300/#commentshttp://theworldistwirly.blog.co.uk/2009/08/20/no-pleasure-and-not-an-island-6769673/tag:theworldistwirly.blog.co.uk,2009-08-20:/2009/08/20/no-pleasure-and-not-an-island-6769673/Thu, 20 Aug 2009 23:05:52 +0200 <p>So i recieved a call this week asking if I want an extra shift. A free trip to pleasure island with the kids. Hey I don't turn down shifts, not being a poor student <img src="/img/smilies/icon_mrgreen.gif" alt=":>>" class="middle" border="0"></p> <p>I can't believe what a shit hole it is, people actually pay money to go there! it was like a ghost town, i was half expecting a tumble weed to pass by a drunken cowboy! </p> <p>But the kids had a laugh and i got to go with this sexy guy from the local school, he was lovely, nice looking, and friendly ( i was mentally marrying him <img src="/img/smilies/graylaugh.gif" alt=":))" class="middle" border="0"> ) The biggest laugh of the day was when a swarm of wasps decended upon us attacking his fanta. I just sat calm (don't want to aggrivate mr waspy!) but he didn't, he lept up waving his arms around spilling fanta all over his arm, which attracted more wasps. I actually ached from laughing. </p> <p>So we walked around the faded shell of a theme park and spied the only decent ride the boomerang, the small child adrenalin rush never goes, although my mature digestive system does not like loop de loop so after 3 goes on it i felt decidedly sick. (maybe the icecream before the bus journey home was not the best move!) </p> <p> <small> <a href="http://theworldistwirly.blog.co.uk/2009/08/20/no-pleasure-and-not-an-island-6769673/#comments">Comments</a> </small> </p>http://theworldistwirly.blog.co.uk/2009/08/20/no-pleasure-and-not-an-island-6769673/#commentshttp://theworldistwirly.blog.co.uk/2009/08/19/south-african-girl-boy-6760823/tag:theworldistwirly.blog.co.uk,2009-08-19:/2009/08/19/south-african-girl-boy-6760823/Wed, 19 Aug 2009 18:20:04 +0200 <p>just seen on the athletics, there is a debate about a runner, whether they are a man or a woman. They are being sent for gender testing.</p> <p>There is a debate on the BBC about whether they should be allowed to run, and if they were once a man and had their gender reassigned then would she be able to run as a woman. </p> <p>If she is a trans person how would you make the decision? obviously there are elements of fairness, how can you compete with a naturally stronger stature, but then there is equal opportunities, if somone lives as a woman should they be excluded?</p> <p>tough call! </p> <p> <small> <a href="http://theworldistwirly.blog.co.uk/2009/08/19/south-african-girl-boy-6760823/#comments">Comments</a> </small> </p>http://theworldistwirly.blog.co.uk/2009/08/19/south-african-girl-boy-6760823/#commentshttp://theworldistwirly.blog.co.uk/2009/08/19/apparently-i-m-cruel-6760674/tag:theworldistwirly.blog.co.uk,2009-08-19:/2009/08/19/apparently-i-m-cruel-6760674/Wed, 19 Aug 2009 18:03:27 +0200 <p>After saving as many caterpillars I could from the brown bin, my mum declared I was cruel to feed a couple to a bird <img src="/img/smilies/graylaugh.gif" alt=":))" class="middle" border="0"> </p> <p>There is this little sparrow that must have just left the nest in our garden, It is now called scratter! i thought it looked pathetic and needed feeding up so put some squiggly caterpillars it's way! hey it's the circle of life right! </p> <p> <small> <a href="http://theworldistwirly.blog.co.uk/2009/08/19/apparently-i-m-cruel-6760674/#comments">Comments</a> </small> </p>http://theworldistwirly.blog.co.uk/2009/08/19/apparently-i-m-cruel-6760674/#commentshttp://theworldistwirly.blog.co.uk/2009/08/17/thanks-to-all-at-the-hull-mini-meet-6745675/tag:theworldistwirly.blog.co.uk,2009-08-17:/2009/08/17/thanks-to-all-at-the-hull-mini-meet-6745675/Mon, 17 Aug 2009 17:22:42 +0200 <p>I just want to say a huge thankyou to everone who went. I had a brillinat time. </p> <p>The meal was lovely (even if through it everyone ended up talking about poo! no soy catching ones poo in your hand to avoid making a noise in echoey bathrooms is NEVER an option <img src="/img/smilies/graylaugh.gif" alt=":))" class="middle" border="0"> ) </p> <p>We didn't cover as many pubs as I thought we would but the beer was certainly flowing and by william wilberforce we were all in full dancing swing. Bearing in mind we are in a pub where no one ever dances and is full of somewhat chavvy northerners. It was a shock to many beer swilling yobs to see a gay couple( one in bunny ears) dancing the steps to tragedy! </p> <p>I hate to think how much we all drunk, inclusive of wine, beer, shorts, shots and the rest. All i know is i had the most AMAZING boost (chocolate bar) when I got in!! <img src="/img/smilies/icon_mrgreen.gif" alt=":>>" class="middle" border="0"></p> <p>I thought i was going to die from laughter reliving the night the next day with soy.</p> <p>I was very ill yesterday, becoming one of the chundercats!!! so missed a lunch opportunity with milly and brokendownangel (sorry guys) </p> <p>But soy and I did have some mahooosive burgers whilst visiting landers and scoobydoofus later which were well needed. It was nice seeing them again and once again reliving the evening. If brad doesn't post that drunken video of landers it will be a crime <img src="/img/smilies/icon_mrgreen.gif" alt=":>>" class="middle" border="0"></p> <p>It seems sad at the end of a meet to think it is going to be a while before I see people again. one night of fun feels like years of friendship. </p> <p>so to gilrean, notbob, milly, brokendownangel, scoobydoofus, landers, and of course soy huge hugs xxx</p> <p> <small> <a href="http://theworldistwirly.blog.co.uk/2009/08/17/thanks-to-all-at-the-hull-mini-meet-6745675/#comments">Comments</a> </small> </p>http://theworldistwirly.blog.co.uk/2009/08/17/thanks-to-all-at-the-hull-mini-meet-6745675/#commentshttp://theworldistwirly.blog.co.uk/2009/08/17/caterpillar-crisis-6745322/tag:theworldistwirly.blog.co.uk,2009-08-17:/2009/08/17/caterpillar-crisis-6745322/Mon, 17 Aug 2009 16:37:27 +0200 <p>I've had to perfom an emergency relocation relocation relocation today.</p> <p>My mum has been growing some veggies, they started to get a bit overgrown and manky so she had a cull. off the remains went into the brown bin, unfortunately there must have been some pesky hitch hikers because i went to the bins today and found lots of caterpillars wiggling around. So i have tried my best to move them to a new home. There were some casualties I'm afraid but here is their journey <img src="/img/smilies/graylaugh.gif" alt=":))" class="middle" border="0"></p> <p><a href="http://www.blog.co.uk/media/photo/summer_2009_062/3796736" title="summer 2009 + 062"><img src="http://data5.blog.de/media/736/3796736_60e1a56832_m.jpg" alt="summer 2009 + 062"></a></p> <p>on the bin, a target with his buds for birds and other beasts</p> <p><a href="http://www.blog.co.uk/media/photo/summer_2009_063/3796737" title="summer 2009 + 063"><img src="http://data5.blog.de/media/737/3796737_6d227e6fbe_m.jpg" alt="summer 2009 + 063"></a></p> <p>in transit, probably a little terrified after seeing the remains of some of his mates smeared across my hand</p> <p><a href="http://www.blog.co.uk/media/photo/summer_2009_066/3796738" title="summer 2009 + 066"><img src="http://data5.blog.de/media/738/3796738_eda1b13d30_m.jpg" alt="summer 2009 + 066"></a></p> <p>new home hopefully safe </p> <p> <small> <a href="http://theworldistwirly.blog.co.uk/2009/08/17/caterpillar-crisis-6745322/#comments">Comments</a> </small> </p>http://theworldistwirly.blog.co.uk/2009/08/17/caterpillar-crisis-6745322/#commentshttp://theworldistwirly.blog.co.uk/2009/08/15/kev-and-row-are-on-post-secret-6727119/tag:theworldistwirly.blog.co.uk,2009-08-15:/2009/08/15/kev-and-row-are-on-post-secret-6727119/Sat, 15 Aug 2009 02:19:41 +0200 <p>there is a link to their facebook page and they are on there as fans <img src="/img/smilies/icon_mrgreen.gif" alt=":>>" class="middle" border="0"> </p> <p> <small> <a href="http://theworldistwirly.blog.co.uk/2009/08/15/kev-and-row-are-on-post-secret-6727119/#comments">Comments</a> </small> </p>http://theworldistwirly.blog.co.uk/2009/08/15/kev-and-row-are-on-post-secret-6727119/#commentshttp://theworldistwirly.blog.co.uk/2009/08/14/am-i-bothered-6726563/tag:theworldistwirly.blog.co.uk,2009-08-14:/2009/08/14/am-i-bothered-6726563/Fri, 14 Aug 2009 22:54:11 +0200 <p>So shy guy is seeing someone. I mean i know it is inevitable and he kind of had to to get over me. It crushed him that i was seeing the cyborg.</p> <p>I don't know it's just that u need a back up guy, someone to tell u that u are great and give u cuddles. I really want him to be happy because i do genuinely care for him. I just well kind of have a lump in my throat. </p> <p>meh i'll live </p> <p> <small> <a href="http://theworldistwirly.blog.co.uk/2009/08/14/am-i-bothered-6726563/#comments">Comments</a> </small> </p>http://theworldistwirly.blog.co.uk/2009/08/14/am-i-bothered-6726563/#commentshttp://theworldistwirly.blog.co.uk/2009/08/14/bring-on-the-trumpets-6724038/tag:theworldistwirly.blog.co.uk,2009-08-14:/2009/08/14/bring-on-the-trumpets-6724038/Fri, 14 Aug 2009 16:24:01 +0200 <p>last post seemed to be a bit of a winge,</p> <p>just wanted to say looking forward to tomorrow, always nice meeting bloggy faces <img src="/img/smilies/icon_mrgreen.gif" alt=":>>" class="middle" border="0"></p> <p>now will soy and I be able to stay sober enough to show people around hmmmm </p> <p> <small> <a href="http://theworldistwirly.blog.co.uk/2009/08/14/bring-on-the-trumpets-6724038/#comments">Comments</a> </small> </p>http://theworldistwirly.blog.co.uk/2009/08/14/bring-on-the-trumpets-6724038/#commentshttp://theworldistwirly.blog.co.uk/2009/08/14/i-thought-my-hangover-yesterday-would-never-leave-i-m-6723788/tag:theworldistwirly.blog.co.uk,2009-08-14:/2009/08/14/i-thought-my-hangover-yesterday-would-never-leave-i-m-6723788/Fri, 14 Aug 2009 16:00:19 +0200 <p>I thought my hangover yesterday would never leave, i'm sure i have had more to drink than that. I was an idiot when i got hope from my few drinkies with my friends. I should never turn on my laptop, i should know this by now.<br> I ended up being a little rude on msn with a guy i knew from school, not really spoken to him for 10 years <img src="/img/smilies/graylaugh.gif" alt=":))" class="middle" border="0"> <img src="/img/smilies/icon_rolleyes.gif" alt=":roll:" class="middle" border="0"> oh well we live and learn ( or not in my case)</p> <p>Been to town today, resisted the urge to buy new clothes, i don't need anymore, although i did still spend money (i'm crap!) got an upgrade for my phone, ended up getting the one i was going to get 2 months ago, sod's law!</p> <p>I had to go into the post office to finally sort out my uni finances, seriously is there a requirement that in order to work for the post office you have to be the most sour faced twat going? </p> <p>Then coming home I heard this song which ultimately depressed me. I'm not a lily allen fan and i think she is punishing me for this by creating this song for me <img src="/img/smilies/graylaugh.gif" alt=":))" class="middle" border="0"></p> <p> <small> <a href="http://theworldistwirly.blog.co.uk/2009/08/14/i-thought-my-hangover-yesterday-would-never-leave-i-m-6723788/#comments">Comments</a> </small> </p>http://theworldistwirly.blog.co.uk/2009/08/14/i-thought-my-hangover-yesterday-would-never-leave-i-m-6723788/#commentshttp://theworldistwirly.blog.co.uk/2009/08/11/cancelled-6699861/tag:theworldistwirly.blog.co.uk,2009-08-11:/2009/08/11/cancelled-6699861/Tue, 11 Aug 2009 16:43:46 +0200 <p>my speed dating has been cancelled for tomorrow </p> <p>*sulks like a petulant child*</p> <p>oh well there will be other times i suppose, i was just looking forward to the randomness of the night.</p> <p>Will have to settle with going out for tea</p> <p>(and save random fun for sat whoop!) </p> <p> <small> <a href="http://theworldistwirly.blog.co.uk/2009/08/11/cancelled-6699861/#comments">Comments</a> </small> </p>http://theworldistwirly.blog.co.uk/2009/08/11/cancelled-6699861/#commentshttp://theworldistwirly.blog.co.uk/2009/08/05/so-bored-6659669/tag:theworldistwirly.blog.co.uk,2009-08-05:/2009/08/05/so-bored-6659669/Wed, 05 Aug 2009 20:58:43 +0200 <p>I need things to look forward to, i have a few things coming up. But i have the whole month from halfway through august to halfway through september off. Yes i have my dissertation to crack on with but i need some plans.</p> <p>any suggestions?? </p> <p>I need some weekends away, some day trips, adventure. I'm bored now and i'm working i'll do my nut with a month of nothing.</p> <p>btw looking forward to hull blog meet and my speed dating <img src="/img/smilies/icon_mrgreen.gif" alt=":>>" class="middle" border="0"> </p> <p> <small> <a href="http://theworldistwirly.blog.co.uk/2009/08/05/so-bored-6659669/#comments">Comments</a> </small> </p>http://theworldistwirly.blog.co.uk/2009/08/05/so-bored-6659669/#commentshttp://theworldistwirly.blog.co.uk/2009/08/03/kids-residential-6639025/tag:theworldistwirly.blog.co.uk,2009-08-02:/2009/08/03/kids-residential-6639025/Mon, 03 Aug 2009 00:00:49 +0200 <p>I had a fab time away with the kids at work, despite an infected wisdom tooth grrr.</p> <p>We went to beamish which was really cool, despite it being an educational visit in disguise. One of the kids did hate it until he saw a horse with a huge penis, then he laughed until he cried. Me being me of course had to fall over, we visted the 1913 school, playing with those metal rings with sticks. All the staff decided to race down a hill, which was far too steep. I fell, so have child like grazes all over my hands and knees!</p> <p> We then went to red car and had a BBQ on the beach, the kids loved it.<br> We stayed in a church in middlesborough over night, I've never slept in a church hall before. The church was brilliant though, the hall was new but it was next to an old church which in essence was just a shell, housing am open garden area. We found in the church a tardis, obviously for some kind of play, but it gave us some amusement.The kids then gave us a talent show before we watched the great escape then went to bed.</p> <p>The second day we got up bright and early, and went to sands end, we walked from here to whitby, the kids after being told not to go in the sea got drenched and winged all the way.<br> at whitby the child in me took over, i made sure i had a change of clothing then, ran to play in the sea with the kids, there were some great waves. We ended the day walking up to whitby abbey then came home. It has taken me all weekend to recover!! oh well more activities planned for the next couple of weeks, heres some snaps of the trip</p> <p><a href="http://www.blog.co.uk/media/photo/summer09_072/3747640" title="summer09 072"><img src="http://data5.blog.de/media/640/3747640_afee8f7eb8_s.jpg" alt="summer09 072"></a><br> <a href="http://www.blog.co.uk/media/photo/summer09_090/3747642" title="summer09 090"><img src="http://data5.blog.de/media/642/3747642_86b166ea1c_s.jpg" alt="summer09 090"></a><br> <a href="http://www.blog.co.uk/media/photo/summer09_093/3747643" title="summer09 093"><img src="http://data5.blog.de/media/643/3747643_90a47bbf9e_m.jpg" alt="summer09 093"></a><br> <a href="http://www.blog.co.uk/media/photo/summer09_103/3747644" title="summer09 103"><img src="http://data5.blog.de/media/644/3747644_5bf75c8359_s.jpg" alt="summer09 103"></a><br> <a href="http://www.blog.co.uk/media/photo/summer09_111/3747645" title="summer09 111"><img src="http://data5.blog.de/media/645/3747645_1fe831cab4_s.jpg" alt="summer09 111"></a><a href="http://www.blog.co.uk/media/photo/summer09_113/3747647" title="summer09 113"><img src="http://data5.blog.de/media/647/3747647_1d9cb590d0_s.jpg" alt="summer09 113"></a><a href="http://www.blog.co.uk/media/photo/summer09_114/3747648" title="summer09 114"><img src="http://data5.blog.de/media/648/3747648_77a36d78ff_s.jpg" alt="summer09 114"></a><a href="http://www.blog.co.uk/media/photo/summer09_115/3747649" title="summer09 115"><img src="http://data5.blog.de/media/649/3747649_0e79a67444_m.jpg" alt="summer09 115"></a> </p> <p> <small> <a href="http://theworldistwirly.blog.co.uk/2009/08/03/kids-residential-6639025/#comments">Comments</a> </small> </p>http://theworldistwirly.blog.co.uk/2009/08/03/kids-residential-6639025/#comments